1. “Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!”

2. “I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”

3. “I asked my wife if she’d ever had a fling. She said, ‘No, but I’ve had a lot of twangs.'”

4. “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”

5. “I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised. I said, ‘No, I mean your eyebrows are too high.'”

6. “I asked my son if he wanted to go fishing. He said, ‘No, I want to go to the mall.’ I said, ‘Well, I guess you can fish for girls there.'”

7. “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”

8. “I asked my wife if she’d ever had a fling. She said, ‘No, but I’ve had a lot of twangs.'”

9. “I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”

10. “Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.”

11. “I asked my wife if she’d ever had a fling. She said, ‘No, but I’ve had a lot of twangs.'”

12. “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”

13. “I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”

14. “I asked my son if he wanted to go fishing. He said, ‘No, I want to go to the mall.’ I said, ‘Well, I guess you can fish for girls there.'”

15. “Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.”

16. “I asked my wife if she’d ever had a fling. She said, ‘No, but I’ve had a lot of twangs.'”

17. “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”

18. “I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.”

19. “I asked my son if he wanted to go fishing. He said, ‘No, I want to go to the mall.’ I said, ‘Well, I guess you can fish for girls there.'”

20. “Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.”